Catching Hell From the Hellish

Even within my own "supposed" community, the community assigned to me by virtue of my sexual preference, I catch hell in the online dating realm, whenever I complain about the content of insipid emails from the dull and ignorant on personals sites. Misspelled words, fragmented sentences, fake modesty, transparent bravado, shallow beliefs, misplaced haughtiness, gender confusion, the walking wounded.... Sometimes I can't believe it. Unfortunately, I have no choice but to believe it, because it's true. It happens to me repeatedly, like some recurring rash... I continue to get those kinds of mails.

I even started a special forum called Atypical Lesbians, to try to accommodate those who felt as I did. I saw it as a sort of Underground Railroad for chagrined, dispirited lesbians who wanted more from their lives and their people; those who wanted to rise above the mundane and stereotypical. I have simply lost my patience with the kind of mentality so commonly revealed in ads and emails from personals sites. Associating with those "types" just depresses me. But five months after I launched the forum, there's very little activity, because apparently, there are not enough lesbians out there who are Atypical. Notwithstanding my good intentions, it's not like you can bring any rise to the unleavened, as it were. This is another thing that Political Correctness helps keep afloat. No one speaks out, no one says this is not acceptable. It keeps us all from evolving. Some truths are still the truths, even if they are uncomfortable to some.

So...I am an individualist, non-conformist...among other things some would label "bitch." Why is it that having standards for yourself and others, automatically relegates you to bitch-status? I don't enjoy being so schismatic with my identity and the identity of others...but somehow if I don't, I feel I will be sucked into the abyss. And if I'm going to be sucked into the abyss, I want it to be the Bliss Abyss, not the abyss of ignorance.

I suppose all this means I am also an Intellectual Separatist. I'm not judging the people, per se, just their behavior, their choices, and the surrounding issues that arise. But it's often so hard to divide a subjective self-concept or cosmology from the objective universal ones. Meaning, some people have certain ideas about themselves, and anything that threatens it is rejected out of hand. Even if what they believe is inaccurate or delusional. They believe what they believe and sometimes can't understand that beliefs are malleable; that evolution is predicated on questions and data-gathering; that what is true now, is not always written in stone; and perhaps most importantly, that if you don't educate yourself and make learning your friend, you will be INCAPABLE of understanding the very concepts that might lead to inner peace and happiness. Contrarily, you also cannot make a silk purse out of a sow's ear. Ultimately everyone has to take the reins on their own buggy and guide it where they want it to go.

And then there's that old Prime Directive (from Star Trek)--never interfere with the natural evolution of a species. I think that applies here, too. We can help when asked or when we think we might be able to LightSwitch someone; we can put our ideas out there and hope they are considered. But ultimately, everyone is on her own path, and what she learns has to be visceral. Ideas will only take you so far. Action is the defining element. And I can't make anyone do anything they don't want to do.

PC, Bad. Honesty, Good.

Political Correctness, I believe, is doing more harm than good in this country...

For instance, that message you get when you call almost any business line that says,"Press one for English." As an American, I understand that the native language is English. If there are those in this country who only speak Spanish, then let them press one for Spanish. If they came here to integrate, then it's "When in Rome, do as the Romans do." It's not that it's all that profoundly inconvenient to press one, it's that it's aggravating because of what it represents.

This sort of thing goes on because everyone is trying so damn hard to be Politically Correct. It goes on because there is some misguided fear that we might hurt some feelings. We tippy-toe around things like fearful slaves. I'm not expecting anything from anyone I don't also expect from myself. If I moved to France, I would expect to learn French in order to be there. I wouldn't expect every public service to provide me with English Language options. I would respect that French was their native language and if I wanted to visit there, I should learn how to speak it.

I also think that our fear of not being Politically Correct keeps us from communicating in other ways. How can we discuss something fully, and gain any understanding, if we are censored in our speech? It's counter-productive to the health of our country and the progression of us as a species. If we are always so overly concerned with offending someone, things don't get discussed. And when they don't get discussed, they don't get solved. It's like that old cliche, "you can't see the forest for the trees." Political Correctness can often serve to cloud the issues, rather than solve them.

For instance, when I say, "Those welfare mothers who continue to use children as pawns for their own sustenance should be booted off the system and made to make their own way more honestly," I get blasted for being insensitive, prejudiced, and even racist. (Oh my god! don't be racist--only black people can call each other nigger, you know. Maybe if black people spoke to each other with respect, white people would do that, too). Yet, this issue has profoundly affected our society and has done nothing to solve the real problems that sprout from it. It's not about skin color. It's not about me trying to feel superior. It's about, "Here's a problem that needs to be solved, here are behaviors that are counter-productive, and let's make sure everyone has the opportunity to improve themselves, without handing all of it to them on a silver platter, so that they don't have to do the work like the rest of us." This issue is at the root of a need for Tort Reform, as well. If anyone can sue for any kind of thing said or done, no matter what, where does it all end? It clogs our courtrooms, it makes the right people poor and the wrong people rich.

People need to stop being such whiners and just do the right thing.

Pretend it's a Secret...

In regard to my previous post "The First Idiot & His Right-Hand Dick".... I have given friends a heads-up. I told them that if I disappear, they'll know who's responsible. The Secret Service.

I want to know: How come they call it the Secret Service, when we all know about it?

So I have two things on my side: First, those guys in suits with a somber expression and a wire coming out of their ear and always speaking into their cufflink--Could they BE any more conspicuous? And they often wear these vests that say right there across the front, "Secret Service." Are we supposed to pretend we can't read?

So...this Secret Service thing...do the members of this elite bodyguard squad have to lie to their families? Like, "Honey, what exactly IS your job? What do you do every day?"

"I'm in the service industry...."

"What kind of service?"

"I can't tell you, it's a secret. If I told you, I'd have to kill you." (I added that last bit because I know people expect to hear it. It's all James-Bond-Romantical.)

Second, I do know they usually abduct people in the middle of the night. (I know this because I watch movies about it, and you can't get a more reliable source than Hollywood). But see, what they don't know is that I'm usually awake in the middle of the night. If they really want to catch me by surprise, they'll sneak in during THE DAY.

Either way, I'll be waiting for them, and when they creep into my room, I'll whip out my squirt gun filled with Absorbine Jr, and then my OTHER squirt gun with warm water, and aim at the same places.

They'll be so uncomfortable with THAT burn, that they'll retreat and make another plan.

But so will I.

Now, of course, I realize they might be reading THIS TOO...but they don't know whether I'm leaving misinformation either...maybe I'm planting red herrings. Maybe I'm not even who I say I am. Maybe that picture on this blog is not a picture of me. Maybe I'm not even female. Or gay.

Okay, yeah. I AM gay.

News I'd Like to Hear

1. Matthew Lesko was gravely injured when the question mark from a "Got Milk?" sign fell and beaned him on the head.

2. Pat Robertson finally struck by lightning.

3. Bush & Cheney on the run as Federal Marshalls try to serve them with an arrest warrant for War Crimes, High Treason, and various other crimes against humanity. Officer in charge of the manhunt says, "We're gonna stay the course, smoke 'em out, and get 'em runnin'."

4. Jerry Falwell's daughter appears on Penn & Teller's Bullshit, and confesses she is a proud lesbian atheist. She credits her father for her conversion.

5. Monica Lewinsky caught "servicing" McCain.

6. Kelli Jae Baeli receives hefty advance and publishing contract from Random House.

The First Idiot & His Right-Hand Dick

The First Idiot is once again revising the reasons for going to war. Now, it seems it is about Osama Bin Laden again and the economy. Funny, in an interview with Anne Curry on February 18th, Bush said, "I don’t think so. I think actually the spending in the war might help with jobs…because we’re buying equipment, and people are working. I think this economy is down because we built too many houses and the economy’s adjusting."

At any given time in the past, Idiot-extraordinaire Dubya said the war was about oh-so-many things--according to what his pea-brain thought would fly. How stupid does he think we are? I can recall when he first announced this war, it was called Operation Iraqi Liberation...until someone with two brain cells to rub together pointed out that the abbreviation for that was OIL. It was changed to Operation Iraqi Freedom.

A recent graduate of the University of Illinois, Devon Largio, did a study of rationals offered by the Bush administration and its cronies for the war. The study only covered a time span between September 2001 and October 2002. "Largio examines the public statements of President George W. Bush, Vice President Dick Cheney, Senate Democratic leader Tom Daschle, Sens. Joseph Lieberman and John McCain, Richard Perle (then chairman of the Defense Policy Review Board), Secretary of State Colin Powell, National Security Advisor Condoleezza Rice, Secretary of Defense Donald Rumsfeld, and Deputy Secretary of Defense Paul Wolfowitz." The table for this study can be found here.

This is the text list:

1. To prevent the proliferation of weapons of mass destruction.
2. For regime change
3. To further the war on terror
4. Because of Iraq's violations of U.N. resolutions.
5. Because of Saddam Hussein's evil dictatorship and actions
6. Because of a lack of weapons inspections in Iraq
7. To liberate Iraq
8. Because of Iraq's links to al Queda
9. Because Iraq was an imminent threat
10. To disarm Iraq
11. To conclude the Gulf War of 1991
12. Because Hussein was a threat to the region
13. For the safety of the world
14. To support the United Nations.
15. Because the US could (easy victory).
16. To preserve peace around the world
17. Because Iraq was a unique threat
18. To transform the region
19. As a warning to other terrorist nations
20. Because Hussein hates the U.S. and will act against it
21. Because history calls the US into action.

And this does not, apparently, cover ALL of the statements made in this regard.

A few days ago, Bush added "the economy" and "because the surge is succeeding" to that list. Once again, Dubya-Dumb-Dumb is under the false illusion that the American people are as stupid as he is, and that you can make a silk purse from a sow's ear. He even had the gall to say that troops would start coming home now. He failed to point out that they were the extras sent for the surge, and the other ones will still be there.

And then there's that other Dick: the Vice President, Dick Cheney. When Cheney said, "On the security front, I think there’s a general consensus that we’ve made major progress, that the surge has worked. That’s been a major success," White House correspondent Martha Raddatz responded, "Two-thirds of Americans say it’s not worth fighting."

And Cheney's Dickish response was, "So?"

Raddatz pushed on: "So? You don’t care what the American people think?"

"No." Big Dick answered. "I think you cannot be blown off course by the fluctuations in the public opinion polls."

This, when we know that there has been no fluctuation in public opinion. Any changes in public opinion have been steadily and increasingly AGAINST the war. But DICK doesn't care what the people think--though ironically, he thinks he can speak for us like he did in February when he said "The American people will not support a policy of retreat." Could there be any clearer indication of public service being a cloak for self-service?

On the 5th anniversary of the "Shock and Awe" (the beginning of the war), Cheney was fishing off a yacht belonging to the Sultan of Oman. It's obvious why he doesn't care what people think and wants the war to continue. He's benefiting from it.

I say try Bush and Cheney (among others) for High Treason and War Crimes, and hang them by the neck until dead.

And just in case someone monitors this and sees it as a death threat, I am NOT offering my services, nor soliciting the services of anyone else. I am instead exercising my right to free speech. We do still have that right in America don't we?

Mark Twain once said, "Patriotism is supporting your country all the time and your government when it deserves it."

That's what I'm doing.

Drag Shows are Aptly Named

Drag shows are aptly named. They are a drag.

Please don't ever expect me to join you at a drag show. I'd sooner perform an appendectomy on myself with a SPOON. And I'm GAY.

All gay bars have drag shows, because apparently, gay people en masse don't have anything else to offer in the entertainment realm. (Notwithstanding the Melissa Etheridge's and Ellen Degeneres's of the world--thank god for them). I'm not expecting a rendition of Bent, but Hell's Bells. Can't they do better than a same tired old stereotypical thing where men and women dress up as women and men and pretend to have talent? Can you pretend to play that unplugged electric guitar any more convincingly? It strikes me as some puerile backyard presentation to mom and dad by a bunch of 7 year olds. "Mom! Mom! Look what *I* can do!"

I know I'm just ripe for an attack from the Homo Hit Squad, but damn! Is being politically correct more important than being honest? I will never understand why people don't want to reach for more in their expressions of selfhood.

And there's another added confusion--is it just me, or is there something inherently wrong with lesbians getting excited about a man, pretending to be a woman? (Like they don't KNOW that under the sequins and fishnet stockings, resides a live, pulsing penis). And the same goes for the drag KINGS. Why would i get excited about a woman pretending to be a man? If I were sexually aroused by a man, I'd be straight.

And have you ever noticed how the audience at drag shows will applaud when the "performer" hits a money-note in the song? Um...hello! He's not REALLY singing, so why are you applauding that? The recording of the REAL singer can't hear you. It's a case of either the willing suspension of disbelief, or the unwitting suspension of rational thought. Either way, something vital is being suspended, and i just find it absurd. I just won't support that crap anymore. I'd rather eat my own brains.

Okay, Homo-Hit-Squad, release the hounds. And you guys try not to break a nail.

Under Construction

I'm in the process of transferring my personal blog files here.
Check back later.